By John C. Cranham, DDS  

Sometimes you can see clearly where you want to go with your dental practice. I can vividly remember driving my car to St. Petersburg for my first class taught by Pete Dawson. It was 1989. When the class was over, I drove my little car all the way back to my 800-square-foot office in Portsmouth, Virginia, and arrived at four o’clock in the morning. I had just bought the office from a doctor who did mostly silver fillings—maybe only four crowns in the entire year. I remember I could visualize what I wanted to do with “my” practice but deciding the first steps was overwhelming.  

A dental office can be the loneliest place in the world. I had to figure out the attainable steppingstones. We didn’t have the internet back then. Finding mentors and connecting with supportive, sharing colleagues was more difficult. In dentistry today, it’s easier to find those steppingstones. One of the most rewarding things I do today is helping dentists develop. 

I caution dentists to not assume they will achieve their big goals fast. There is a temptation to give up when progress is slow. You’ve got to stay on the path to get to where you want to go. Think about your goals and steppingstones every day but be kind to yourself if it takes more time than you visualized.  

Remember that everyone is different. All your buddies are going to be in different cities, different socioeconomic areas, and different practices. They’re going to have different opportunities. Social media can be your enemy when it comes to self-confidence and determination. There will be certain people that develop faster.  

I can remember being very frustrated the first year or two in my little town of Portsmouth. There were dentists going through the same classes I was and were already doing the kinds of cases that I wanted to do but wasn’t doing yet. During the first two years in practice, I sometimes wondered if I would ever do the kind of dentistry I wanted. But I kept in conversation with my patients, eventually they began accepting treatments, and the floodgates finally opened.  

One of the greatest things about this profession is we can always strive to be great. I don’t think I’m there yet. It’s the striving part—the working at it and seeing things improve that makes it so fun and rewarding. I love it.  

People ask me, why are you setting BHAGs at this stage in your life? You’ve already accomplished so much. Why are you totally reinventing your practice systems? Why are you going fully digital after practicing on analog articulators for 35 years? 

What I’ve been able to do in dentistry is constantly reinvent myself, and I feel like I am growing in what I can do. So, I say it’s because reinvention is awesome. It’s fun. And my staff knows that if I get something working well, I’m going to find a way to make it even better tomorrow. 

Gary M. DeWood, DDS, MS 

Adults have a wealth of experience to draw on and they like to do so as part of their learning. Adults are not used to taking direction in education; they choose what they want to learn. When my friend (in Part 1 of this series) lost his active interest in seeking out dental education, he had made a choice to learn other things he hoped to know.  

One of my heroes, Doctor Parker Mahan, told me once that one of the harshest lessons of mortality for him was the realization that he could never live long enough to learn everything he wanted to know. 

Adults need to create specific opportunities to self-reflect and internalize what they are learning in order to integrate it with what they already know. Adults have preconceived notions about education, learning style, and subject matter that interfere with their learning. Adults are often afraid to fail so they frequently guard their learning process by telling themselves why what they are hearing is wrong. 

Where children are sponges when it comes to learning, as adults our brains adapt to experiences and interactions that occur “on purpose.” We acknowledge a reason to remember that experience…to have that new knowledge. 

Here’s an example. 

Our eldest child, Patricia, entered a world in which those charged with her immediate care had barely learned to care for themselves–a world to which she adapted very quickly. In no time she had taken control of the lives of two sentient beings who proudly professed their independence and right to make decisions about their own lives but nonetheless jumped through the hoops of her creation as soon as they were offered. 

After the grandmothers had departed and Cheryl and I were now totally responsible for this baby FOR REAL, her training of us began in earnest. Turns out Cheryl and I CAN be taught, proven by our immediate response to Patricia’s guidance in managing her universe. A visit by Uncle Toby and Aunt Patsy presented us with an opportunity to learn from another source. 

Following a hearty meal, a very sleepy baby was laid in her crib for some sleep. Almost immediately upon our return to the living room Patricia realized she was no longer being held, and realized she was no longer where the “party” was happening. Being WITH the party is very high on Patricia’s list. When she “called out” in response to that situation, two very well-trained parents immediately stood to head for the emergency that was happening for the helpless baby. Uncle Toby looked at us as we simultaneously rose and said, “What are you thinking?” 

That might sound like a question, but it was really a statement that meant “stop.” So, when Uncle Toby asked his “question,” Cheryl and I stopped as we were instructed. Uncle Toby then asked, “What are you teaching that baby if you go in there and pick her up every time she cries?” 

As brand-new, first-time parents, this thought was alien to us. Being so well trained, we thought our only mission in life was to keep the baby from crying. With some angst in our stomachs that tightened each time Patricia’s wailing reached a new crescendo, we sat in the living room and pretended to ignore what we were hearing.  

Suffice it to say that when our second child Dale came along, he learned, and reasonably quickly, that we were not necessarily coming every time he rang the bell.  

Every day, we hear and see a lot of information that never makes the transition to “learning” because it does not produce change.
Change can only occur for adults when we enter into an agreement with ourselves that there is something we want to learn in what is being said or shown to us. We ACT on it. 

The truth is EVERY interaction we have with any other person or situation is a potential learning experience if we reflect upon it and internalize its meaning for us and act on it. It’s impossible not to learn. We do it all the time. Lifelong learning is thus a forgone conclusion.  

One of the greatest joys in dental practice is creating learning moments for patients by providing intentional opportunities for them to experience their oral health and interact with us in a way that provokes their curiosity, internal reflection, and acknowledgement of needs. Just as we are lifelong learners, we can trust that they are lifelong learners, too. 

It seems we all have things I call “touchstones” that we keep around to help us feel grounded and to remind us of who we are. We also have items around us simply because they make us smile.

A good friend of mine used to talk about having a garage sale for her thoughts and behaviors, and I love that idea! My own experience has taught me that the people, belongings, and structures I surround myself with have an enormous impact on my thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

A few years back, I downsized to an 800 square foot mountain home in Black Mountain, North Carolina that I lovingly call the “Tiny Mansion.” When I made this move, I got rid of so much stuff! I literally touched everything I owned and made a thoughtful decision on what would stay and what would go.

I found that I kept things that connected me in a concrete way to different people, places, and experiences that had special meaning. I let go of lots and lots of things that were not essential tools as well as things that were related to people, memories, or parts of my life I was ready to release. I’ve learned that growth is not only about adding to our lives, but maybe even more importantly, it’s about letting go of that which no longer serves us.

Now what I do is intentionally surround myself with what encourages me to be the person I want to be, and to feel the way I want to feel when I’m in the world. All the books I have on my shelf are purposefully there. I scan through them on a regular basis to make sure they are still books that have special meaning. Another habit I’ve created is to get rid of something every time I make a purchase. Buy shoes…get rid of shoes. Buy a shirt…get rid of 2 shirts. It’s a deliberate choice designed to keep me from becoming overwhelmed by a whole bunch of stuff that I no longer want or need.

To live that intentionally was new to me when I decided to make my move to the Tiny Mansion. Necessity drove me to become highly selective about what I would see and touch in my day-to- day world. This idea became part of my updated philosophy…my living, thinking approach to curating positive things, people, actions, and experiences in my life. I am in a dynamic process of becoming my best self (almost) every day.

What inspired me to share this is the realization that I was smiling when I poured a smoothie in one of my Pankey cups. This particular piece of my “Pankey merch” collection was a gift from Dr. Lee Brady, and I love (on many levels) what it means to me.

I feel absolutely uplifted by being surrounded by things I love. The ability to see and touch these “stones” is a positive force in my life. I wonder what you might surround yourself with that is intentional and has meaning for you. I also wonder what you might be ready to let go of. Which things do you choose to be visible touchstones in your life?