Our good intentions and true thoughts surrounding a difficult situation with a patient can get lost in the communication process. When we fail to meet patient expectations, we can almost become a different person.

Our patient interprets what we say and do as demonstrations of our character. This is why, if we want to resolve conflicts and make patients feel understood, we need to pay special attention to showing that we care.

How to Show You Care About Patient Concerns

There are many ways to show you care that can be beneficial on both sides. It also helps to take criticism not as a personal affront, but as an opportunity for improving our communication skills. It may seem counterintuitive, but the best way to soothe or diffuse heightened emotions is to let people experience them. Allow patients to fully express their upset, instead of trying to shoot them down or make light of the situation.

Then, truly embrace empathy. Don’t just listen and nod without truly empathizing with their upset. Let them know that you understand how hard the situation is for them. Next, acknowledge the challenge of revealing their true feelings by thanking them for their honesty and for telling you what they think.

And then there’s the hardest part: apologize. You don’t need to admit you’re guilty and beg their forgiveness. You simply need to express how sorry you are that they are experiencing upset. Also, don’t assume that you can guess how to fix the problem.

Ask your patient how they want to be helped and be honest about whether you can make it work. By patiently listening and acknowledging their feelings, you may have already given them exactly what they wanted.

How do you show your patients that you care? Let us know in the comments! 

Throughout my dental hygiene, dental school, and residency programs, I was blessed to have exceptional instructors and role models. All of them encouraged me, believed in me, and most importantly, impressed upon me the importance of lifelong learning. Many of them recommended Pankey, telling me to go there as soon as I could.

A Journey to Deeper Patient Relationships

That journey began in 1994. I will never forget sitting in Dr. Irwin Becker’s philosophy class as he talked about the Crosses of Dentistry. He discussed “Knowing Your Patient” and I remember becoming very emotional.

As a young hygienist, it would bother me when I would see a re-care patient and not remember what we talked about the previous time. I started jotting things down on index cards about each patient and keeping them in a private file. Not the things you would typically see in chart notes, but personal things they felt comfortable sharing.

Each time they came in, I would refer to the personal card file and refresh my memory as to where we left off. There was no way I would have been able to remember all those special discussions, so I had to write them down. Each time they came in, the next chapter began.

I also started sharing more information about myself. I found the more I shared, the deeper the conversations went. I really wanted to know my patients on a much deeper level and that is what happened over time.  

When I came back to the Pankey Institute for the second continuum, I was pleasantly surprised to be greeted by name by Dr. Ernie Anderson, one of the course instructors, as I stepped into the elevator of the condos. Obviously, he had taken time to look at the roster to see who was in the class and that was very impactful. The kindness, thoughtfulness, and encouragement shown to me at the Institute were instrumental in demonstrating how I wanted to make my patients feel during my care.

Time spent getting to know my patients has resulted in lifelong relationships. Of all the things I’ve learned, this is one of the most important keys to a meaningful and enjoyable career.